Aries | You’ll realize you’re being cheated by a companion, causing you to run off to another country.
Taurus | You’ll disagree with someone and be wrong, before eventually deciding that you know best.
Gemini | Before you blow your credibility in an argument with someone who actually believes your theory, ask yourself: Do you really think you can be right about this whole thing?
Cancer | A stylish skirt will completely discredit your existence to a wide audience, leading you to ask yourself: Do I even exist?
Leo | Since you’re so incredibly talented, it would behoove you to try applying it to real-world problems.
Virgo | Despite what Hollywood would like you to believe, your star isn’t in the sky, it’s just that you’re wearing a bedsheet.
Libra | Relationships have often gotten stale, or they should have gotten stale, but they have never gotten stale just because you gave them another five-year contract.
Scorpio | This is so silly, you want it to end now. With the collapse of the United States, maybe you should have tried it.
Sagittarius | Don’t let your stubbornness prevent you from entertaining the idea of shared experiences. It’s such a great lesson to learn about compromise.
Capricorn | Callously, a woman at your department store has stolen your knickknacks and pretended to be you.
Aquarius | Since you suddenly have way more time on your hands, write three new short stories.